Hi everyone, this is Esateys. Today I’m going to speak about something that I know is very important to you, but you may not even know how important it is to you, because you may not even realize that it’s actually happening. So, the title of our little chat today is “the pattern of trauma drama and how to break it.”
Now, some of you may be going, ya, I’m not into drama and I don’t hardly ever really have any traumas because, you know I’m really together. If you’re human, you have dramas and you have traumas. Now maybe you’re not perceiving them as that, maybe you’re not even calling them that, but you have this kind of stuff happening in your life, right? Some people, it’s like WHOA, and for other people, it’s like this. But we have things that are ebbing and flowing in our lives all the time. Well, what happens is we have certain things occur and they develop into patterns. Patterns mean that we’re doing something over and over again, and some people will call them habits. But there’s something about patterns that’s a little bit different, and the habits are something that we’re doing just unconsciously.
Patterns are actually the fabric of the habit. The patterns are the pieces that we have actually put together to create the habit occurring. And what’s important about that is, if you are doing things unconsciously, then you’re going to notice that your life is pretty unconscious, you’re not going to be having everything the way that you would really like it to be. So, it’s important to recognize that when you’re cycling around and you’re doing something over and over again, you are in a pattern. Now, there’s some advantages to being in a pattern. If there are things that you really enjoy doing, and one of your patterns might be that you have a ritual, or that you get up and you do things in a certain way, and you follow through and it’s just become a way of life for you. And those kinds of things can be really awesome, including having a pattern of having excellence everywhere in your life. Only allowing yourself to think, feel, speak and be in a state of excellent. Dress in a state of excellent, and be in a place that’s extraordinary.
If you want your life to be extraordinary, then you have to be extraordinary. You can’t just think it up and hope it happens. And one of the ways that you get to do this, is by creating a pattern of this. Now, the disadvantage of patterns is that you might put yourself in a place where you are continuously thinking about what isn’t working. (Gasp) I can’t do that because I don’t have enough money! (Gasp) I can’t go there because I won’t be excepted! (Gasp) I can’t do that because I’m gonna have something occur that will probably not work for me! (Gasp) I can’t do that because I’ve got something else happening! (Gasp) I can’t be with him, I can’t be with her! I can’t do anything because I’ve got some kind of pattern running in my head. Some kind of program running in my head that isn’t working for you, but it’s comfortable. It’s familiar so we just keep on doing that, and every time we do, we deepen that pattern.
Those are not the patterns that I recommend that you keep. You have the ability to change your patterns, but what’s important is first you must have the awareness that you’ve got a pattern running. So, here’s a suggestion. What if you observed yourself in a very powerful way, and what that means is that you just watch the things that you do. When you get out of bed in the morning, just notice, just kinda like step over here for a moment and just watch yourself go to the bathroom. And what’s your routine? You go to the bathroom, you brush your teeth, you take a shower, whatever it is that you do. And just observe the things you do. But this is another piece that you want to observe.
Notice what it is that you’re thinking, while you’re doing what it is that you’re doing, because patterns can be informational or mind-driven, thought-driven. They can also be habituated by a pattern of what your bodies used to. So, here’s an example that some of you may or may not appreciate, but your colon is in a pattern. It’s used to getting up in the morning, for most people, and eliminating. So, you get up, you eliminate and if you aren’t, you probably ought to see me because we should talk about that constipation thing. But, if you are not really having something consistently occurring, then the erridicatness of it is not necessarily a bad thing, except for the constipation piece. You actually can have things feel uncomfortable in your body, cause your body loves patterns, it likes to keep doing the same thing over and over again.
So, your job is to observe what’s happening in your body, in your mind, in your emotions and everywhere else, and decide. Hmm, is that a pattern that’s really good for me? Is it really raising my vibration and helping me feel awesome about my work, about my children, about my health, about everything else that’s occurring? You get to decide because there’s no real right or wrong to any pattern, but we acquire these from repetitive behavior and we get them because usually, and it seems I’m always blaming parents and childhood, but let me tell you, we grow up mimicking what we see and hear the most. So, it’s an unusual person that doesn’t have some of that happening at a pretty high level. So, you get to look at that and see if some of the things that you picked up, are still effective for you.
Now, that’s an important statement, is it still effective for you? Is it who you are now? Have you outgrown the pattern that you might be living in some or many areas of your life? Because, what happens is we outgrow things, but we keep on doing them! How silly is that? How are we gonna grow, how are we going to spend, how are we going to be all that we’re capable of being, if all we’re doing is just repeating this recycled ignorance and these patterns that are no longer effective? So, you’re going to get up, you’re going to observe. You’re going to decide for yourself, is this raising my vibration and helping me really expand out of my comfort zone into a whole new world, or is it keeping me all comfortable and caught in my same old pattern? Then when you decide that, you get to decide if you would like to eliminate that or if you want to keep it.
So, if you decide that you want to change any pattern, what’s important that you do is that you first recognize it, and secondly make a decision that, that pattern’s no longer effective for you and now you have to step in and do something different. So, what you do is you determine, what pattern would I like? Because the truth is we all live from a habitual place. We repeat things over and over again, we are pretty much robotic. Hate to say those words, but we are. Maybe not in every area, but we’re pretty predictable. Humans are very predictable actually, and one of the things that I’ve learned through a whole bunch of years of coaching and being with people, and doing retreats and seminars, and being in medicine, oh my goodness then I really get to see them. So, there’s lots of things that I’ve learned about the human condition, and what’s important for you to recognize is that you become the CEO, if you will, of your own human condition.
So, you notice something you want to change, and then you make a decision about what pattern you’d like to replace it with. And then you start with that, you start step by step, and you decide for yourself. Ok, let’s just say that your pattern is that you can only brush your teeth with your right hand, because you’d probably get your eyebrows if you did your left if you’re like some people. So, if you decide you want to change that pattern, you get up in the morning and every day, it doesn’t matter if it takes you 20 minutes, you brush your teeth with your left hand. Be sure that, if you’re a woman you don’t put your make-up on first. And then you brush up and you get used to developing that way of being until you can do that on a regular basis.
Now, I’m just giving you one little simple example, but the bottom line is you replace what it was that you were doing, with what it is that you would like to do, and how you would like it to be. And there’s many steps to most patterns, so it’s very important that you become aware of all the different steps of the pattern and all the different parameters that you’re letting, and then you create a new way of doing it. I can tell you if you are willing to take the time and the energy and make the commitment to let go of the patterns that aren’t working for you, and you replace them, first of all you’re going to feel like a master. Secondly, you’re in control of your life and the ways that you’re being, and thirdly, you’re gonna feel really awesome because you’ve let go of things that aren’t really effective for you anymore.
So, that’s what you get to think about today. And don’t judge your patterns! Do not judge your patterns! You got that because you got them, you have them because you have them and you don’t have to keep them. So, the trauma-drama cycle can be ended, BOOM, just like that if you decide that you notice that you’ve got that pattern going and then you complete it. I would love to connect with you, I appreciate your comments and the things that you are doing to stay connected to me, and I really appreciate this very, very much.
So, write some more comments, write me private messages, talk to me, connect with me, and go to www.esateys.com and check out the free little gift there that I have for you. I love when you are being in my life. Today’s question is: what if I released all of my patterns that were no longer effective for me? Until next time, mwah. Feel the hug.
Author: Esateys Stuchiner
Esateys (pronounced Ee sáh teez) is an International Life Transformational Speaker, Author, Master Facilitator, Life Coach and Expert in the Human condition. She is a Nationally and Board Certified Nurse Practitioner. For over 30 years, she has practiced, taught and lectured extensively in the allopathic and alternative medicine field.
Esateys is known for her groundbreaking work in the areas of personal empowerment and health restoration using mindset and inner connection as the catalyst for all change.
Esateys describes herself as the ‘Architect of the New You’ and has dedicated her life and professional career to helping her clients create “New Beginnings” by facilitating self empowerment, economic freedom and restored health.
For more information, go to esateys.com.