Days go by, slowly filling you up with more things to do. As stacks of tasks continue to pile up, you start to feel overwhelmed and overloaded. This is where you find yourself asking for more because things are not enough. There is not enough time, not enough resources, not enough of yourself to handle all of these tasks. You feel drained and eventually disconnected with everything. There is no joy anymore in what you do, and this is a very sad case. Life is about doing what you love. It is about fulfilling yourself with the things you can do best. Learn how to do a more solid to-do list that will help you overcome all of these overwhelming feelings from being overloaded.
Listen to the podcast here:
Overwhelmed & Overloaded
I’m so excited to be here with you. Have you ever been in a contemplative place where you’re thinking about how overwhelmed you are, how freaked out you are, how completely overloaded you are in pretty much every area of your life? Do you wake up in the morning and for ten seconds, you feel good and then all of a sudden, the mind kicks in and you’re going, “I have this to do. I didn’t get to that yesterday. I wonder if I’m ever going to ever get that done.” Your mind is going through the three or four-page list of things that you have to do. If you’re anything like me, this is a fairly common experience. You may also find that when you go to bed at night, the same thing occurs.
I’ve been coaching many, many people who have been telling me that they’re having difficulty with sleeping. When I get a little deeper into what it is that’s going on, they proceed to tell me about their life, about their work, about their children, about their money, about their health, all the things that are going on and the 322 things that they need to do for each one of those categories every single day. It is pretty ominous when you consider the amount of things that we do in a 24-hour period. What happens is we take that to bed with us. It interferes with our sleep. We may not sleep at all. We may sleep fitfully, we may wake up and then go back to sleep, we may have reoccurring dreams or we might have nightmares. There are many different things that go on because we are completely overloaded with stress.
Stress comes from many different things. One of the things that it comes from is being unable to process the amount of data and the amount of information that we need to process on a daily basis, which we feel responsible for completing. Where does all this come from? It comes from scarcity. Our world and a very core deep issue within every single human being is there’s not enough. What do you think overwhelm and overload are about? It’s about not enough what? It’s not enough time, not enough energy, not enough of fill in the blank. The bottom line is it’s not enough. We feel like there’s not enough of me to get that handled. In fact, I wrote an email to someone who gave a beautiful feedback about a retreat that we did and some of the things that we’re working on, worldwide game changers and other special projects that we’re doing.
She was commenting about how awesome she felt that they were and how they were going to be so supportive of so many people. I wrote back, “I’m in such agreement and I appreciate your feedback.” I went on and on. Then I said, “If I can just squeeze in an extra day in my week and I can duplicate myself, I’ll be able to do maybe half of that.” I didn’t say it quite that extensively, but pretty much. The bottom line is I am speaking about this because I’m in your seat. I’m in my own seat doing the same exact thing because I realized that the one issue I personally have is feeling like there is more to do than there is time for me to do it. Have you ever felt that way? I’m sure you have, or you wouldn’t be reading this.
Let me tell you what I have come to recognize and how it is that we can all plow right on through this and master this. I implemented some of these things and they’re working for me. I’m going to share those with you. I want to go back, do a little history. Anybody who knows me is probably cracking up because I don’t know anything about history. I am not a history person. Rafael has asked me many times, “Did they pass you in history class? How did you get through that? Did you just suck up to the teacher or what?” I might have but the bottom line is I didn’t retain much of anything that I took because I did pass all my classes and I did well. The bottom line is history is not all that important to me, but I remember a little bit about cowboys and Indians because I grew up on a farm and I thought I was Annie Oakley.
Frame Of Mind
I know I’m giving you a lot of personal stuff here, but here is I want you to know, we grow up in a certain frame of mind, a certain frame of reference we have. If you’re older than twenty or maybe even older than 30, you might realize that technology was not the same as it is now. We didn’t have the computers. We didn’t have the cell phones. We didn’t have all the things that we do, and we take for granted now. The younger generation takes it for granted. They don’t know what it was like to have to hand write an invoice or to make a call on a party line where you had six or eight other people on the phone with you or vying for the same telephone line. They didn’t grow up where things were slower and were not done with the expectancy that we have now.
In fact, it was much different now. Truly people died earlier because they didn’t have the technology and the health capabilities that we have now. They didn’t have a lot of the things that we have. It’s been a little bit of bittersweet then, a little bit of bittersweet now because the things that we didn’t have then that we have now are now causing other issues. The depth of what I’m about to say is pretty profound. The world continues to have good, bad, right, wrong, up, down, because we live in a polarity-based system. We live in a binary system. As soon as one thing gets fixed, we’re going to have the opposite occur. You’ve all heard of that child’s game whack-a-mole where you smack down the little pin or whatever that thing is, and then it pops up somewhere else. That’s like how life works. You fix one thing, but there’s something that comes up to oppose that because that’s the way it’s meant to be.Learn to be with what is without resistance and you will be free. Click To Tweet
It’s not wrong. It’s not broke. There’s nothing to fix it. It’s okay the way it is. What does that mean for us? It means that we must learn how to be with what is. Once you get that, that would change you forever. Learn to be with what is without resistance and you will be free. You’ll never have stress. You will never have an issue. You will not walk around feeling like the world needs to do something different to make you happy. You won’t feel like you have to make your life be different to be happy. You won’t feel like anything needs to change. You’ll be darn joyful. Getting there, it may be not as easy as it appears to be.
Let’s go back for and talk about this polarity thing. Since we know, and hopefully we’re all in agreement that for every something we have, the opposing have something else. There was some famous person who said, “For every action, there is an equal or greater reaction.” That absolutely occurs. Based on that, we must learn if we want to know joy, if we want to master overwhelm and overload, we must learn how to be with what is without resistance. It means that we will be okay with whatever is occurring. When we’re okay with what is going on, then we’re not going to feel overwhelmed and overloaded. Your mind may be saying, “This is all just like airy-fairy, esoteric. I need to know how I’m going to get my to-do-list complete.”
To get your to-do-list complete, we have to look back a little bit and look at some of the core things. One of the things that have been true about me forever is I want to know the cause. I want to know where it comes from. I want to know what I can do at a deep core level to make things different. That’s one of the reasons why I went into alternative medicine. Most of you know that I’m licensed in traditional or allopathic medicine, who treats the symptoms. If you don’t get to what caused the symptoms, you’re going to have a repetitive issue going on. As I moved more into alternative medicine, homeopathy, herbs and Ayurvedic medicine and things of that nature, I became very excited because the holistic approach allowed me to get more to the cause than the traditional modality.
Your Place In The World
I still think traditional medicine is awesome. I’m excited to have it. I use it whenever it is necessary. When you can get to the core of the issue, you are going to find that things will change absolutely and completely. We have this thing going on. We’ve got a basic principle on the planet, Scarcity Principle. Scarcity Principle means there’s not enough of me, not enough of you, not enough money, not enough love, not enough time. We also have covered that we are in a position where there’s nothing that we’re going to do to make this different in the outer world that is going to change the polarity-based system that we live in. This planet is based on a duality. That means that the only thing that can change, is you. The only thing that you are going to be able to do to find the joy, to master the overwhelm is to look at how you are framing it and how you are perceiving it.
I want you to understand that if you do not take full responsibility for your overwhelm and for your overload, then you’re going to have a very hard time. Overload and overwhelm immediately put us in a place where we feel victimized. Did you ever think about that? The minute we feel like something’s happening that is out of our control, we feel victimized. We feel powerless and impotent. We do not feel like we can control anything, so we feel out of control. What happens when we feel victimized, when we feel out of control, when we feel like things are not going the way that we want? We feel crummy. Our frequency, our energy level goes down.
We get depressed, we’re grumpy. We project things on other people because we don’t like the way we feel. We hope if we yell at somebody else or blame somebody else that somehow, we will feel better, which is silly. We do that anyway because that’s what personalities do. When you start to look at this, you start to recognize that there is nothing that anybody else is going to do to save you. There’s no need to be a victim because you have pure, absolute capability of shifting anything you desire. The rest of the world is going to keep on doing their happy dance or their sad dance because the truth is, the rest of the world doesn’t care with what’s going on with you.Ultimately you get to decide about being happy, sad, mad, overwhelmed, joyful, in peace, or not. You are that powerful. Click To Tweet
There are a lot of big open-hearted people in the world. That is true, they are caring in their own way but ultimately, it’s up to you. You get to decide about being happy, sad, mad, glad, overwhelmed, overloaded, joyful, in peace, in joy or not. You’re powerful. You’re amazing. You have one thing that no one else in the entire world has. You have absolute free will and absolute free choice about how you perceive and be with whatever is going on in the world. Maybe you can’t change exactly what is going on in the world. Can you stop the war in Syria or wherever the war is these days? Can you stop the sun from shining or not shining? Most of the time you’re going to find that there are certain things you have zippo control over. Based on that, you start to recognize that things just happen sometimes.
When you come to peace with the fact that the world is occurring, it’s doing what the world does. People are doing what they do, their patterns, their beliefs, their ideas are within them. It leaves you with you. You’re the only one left here. Ultimately, they don’t have anything to do with you. If something goes on with someone else appearing to be over there, it’s always back to you. How do you choose to be with what it is that’s going on with them? I know that most people’s minds are going to say, “They yelled at me. They’re doing that to me.” You have a right to decide what you want to do with what it is that they’re doing. You’re always empowered. You’re always in the ability station of deciding for yourself what you want to do. How you frame what it is that’s going on is going to create your happy, sad, mad or glad. That means that you’re overwhelmed and your experience of feeling overloaded is based on how you’re setting up your perception. I go through this a lot.
Simple And Full Life
The truth is that I’ve gotten this much more mastered and there are times when I forget. I literally have a list that is four pages long of things that I am committed to doing. I might mark off one or two and add five. I have job security, that part is cool. The part that is pretty overwhelming if I choose to go there is that I can never catch up. I can never keep up. I seemingly can’t get all the things done that I want to get done. Not everybody lives this way. There are people who do not have 2,700 things on their plate. There are those of you out there who may have a simple life. A simple life is a much easier life to live. I used to feel like I was “supposed to have a simple life.” I still have this little thing on my desk that says, “Enjoy the simple life. Be simple.” I have forgotten about that. I can’t spell the word very well either apparently because I don’t live a simple life. I live a complex life. It’s very full. I do many things. I have pretty much all my life been that way and it’s something that I’m okay with.
For me, it’s about embracing and living life to its fullest. It’s about taking on as many things as I possibly can and completely absorbing everything about them that I possibly can. A day doesn’t go by that I don’t learn something new. I am very committed to education, increasing my knowledge, being more connected and being in a place where I have things that I want to have more of. One perception is that I’m in scarcity. Another perception is I’m so passionate about life. I’m so alive with life. There’s so much I want to embrace. There are so many things that I want to do. It’s exciting to be alive. I wake up in the morning and go, “I get to do this. I get to do that.” I’m very excited.If we really want to know joy, we must learn to be okay with whatever is occurring and changing. Click To Tweet
There are seemingly not enough hours in the day, so that can either be scarcity or it can be passion. How are you framing your overload? Are you feeling victimized? Are you feeling excited? Are you feeling overwhelmed? Are you feeling passionate? Are you recognizing that every single thing that you have going on in your life is self-imposed? These are important to-dos as well. The to-do is you decide for yourself what it is that you are doing with what it is you have going on. Are you calling it overwhelm? Are you calling it overload or are you calling a passion and excitement? Which would fit for you? The minute you shifted over to, “I’m so excited,” suddenly the guilt goes away, the victim goes away and there’s a new level of energy that comes forward.
I have new motivation when that occurs. When I look at my list and say, “I’ll never get all this done. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I need to hire seven more people. I need to do this.” Then, I feel down. I feel yucky. My vibration is low. I draw more of that vibration. You’ve all heard of the Law of Attraction, “What you put out comes back.” If I’m in a place where I’m not feeling good about myself and what’s going on in my life, what am I going to draw more of to me over time? Yet if I wake up in the morning and go, “I love my life. I’m so excited. I get to do that,” I’m very grateful for that opportunity.
I’m grateful that I have an opportunity to live life. That’s one option. The other is I’m never going to catch up. I’m never going to do this. I want to emphasize to you that how you’re framing what you have going on has everything to do with your joy or your stress. Here are some things that you can do when you have a lot of things that are on your plate but you want to do them all. You just don’t know how to fit them in. There’s a program that I use and there are several that you can use. There’s something called Todoist. It’s a free, although they have an upgrade, program that helps you manage the things that you have to do. You create projects and all these things with it.
Another one that Rafael and I happened to like even better than that, it’s more comprehensive, it’s not free, it costs money and it’s called Swift To-Do. If you want more information about that, let me know, just send me an email to Esateys@UltimateRelationshipAcademy.com. These two programs are just options. There are many out there. We use Swift To-Do and the other thing that I’m using is my daily calendar. I have my own database, you can put in more than one database. One can be for your work, one can be for personal or you can combine them all or do whatever it is you want. Under there I have projects. I might have coaching, blogging, podcast, worldwide game changers, Self-healing Institute, writing articles, editing articles, creating new content, creating new programs.
I have a lot of different projects and then under each one of them I will put a “What do I need to do” and a time in which that I’m committing to get that done by. That helps me keep it on paper and I’m clear about what it is. Every morning I can look at that or every night before I go to bed. What I recommend that you do is get your phone and put down chunks of time that is going to give you the appropriate timeframe for what it is that you have to do. As an example, my phone is set up that when I have a task or an appointment, my phone sends me a little ding-ding ten minutes before my next appointment is.
On my phone, for example, I coached between 11:00 AM and 12:00 PM. I edited articles from 12:00 PM to 1:00 PM. I had lunch from 1:00 PM to 1:30 PM. From 1:30 PM to 2:30 PM, I had a call about KETO//OS, which is a company that we have a powerful ketosis drink that supports our health. For another hour and then for another hour and a half, I had some coaching things that I needed to follow up on. I had coached seven people the day after the retreat that we had done in California and there were certain homeopathic. There were certain things that I wanted to recommend to people. I knew that was going to take me a while. I put that in there. I really looked at that schedule. I couldn’t take time for all the interruptions because I was going to follow that schedule impeccably. The first thing you have to decide is, do you really want to get it done?
If you do, then you have a list from your Todoist or from Swift. You know what needs to be done that day because you prioritize it first. I couldn’t possibly do all the things on my list. What I did is I took out and chunked down the things that I felt were maybe my five highest priority things of the day. I put them in a time block on my phone. It was cool because I was working, and I was typing up these papers that I needed to type up for the coaching thing and my phone went ringing. It told me that I have ten minutes left to finish that project because my next one was coming up. It helped me zip along. It meant that I had on my phone the time when I was going to go do my Facebook, my email and my texts. I didn’t take interruptions. I framed a time during the day to do that. By following that, I had the most productive day ever. It was very awesome.
The other thing that was very supportive of me is I felt so accomplished at the end of the day. What occurs is when we become overwhelmed and overloaded, we’re usually just fragmented. We’re not really getting things done. We’re just flittering from here to there to whatever. We’re multitasking trying to get something done when something else interrupts. I’m a frigging firefly when it comes to it are a hummingbird. I move from things very quickly. I’m pretty good at multitasking, but it’s not the most effective way. It doesn’t mean I don’t still do it some of the time. My recommendation is if you follow this outline that I gave you about literally using time blocks to do what it is that needs to be done, then you will be more effective. You will be much more successful at what it is you say you’re going to do. Then you celebrate at the end of the day all the things that you completed.
At the end of the day, I was a little over my schedule by about half an hour. I didn’t get everything done. I don’t even remember if I was going to do a podcast or if I was wanting to do an extra article. The bottom line is I didn’t get that done and I didn’t freak out. I just put that over on this schedule and then that helped me know. I went upstairs and said to Rafael, “This works so awesome.” I’ve done this in the past before, but never quite so succinctly as that. The only thing is I have to learn how to be a little bit better judge about how much time it’s going to take to do certain things. Once you perfect that, then you will be able to follow this like a well-oiled machine and you’re going to feel awesome.
You’ll be very successful. You won’t feel overwhelmed and overloaded, that’s one thing. Another thing to assess for yourself is, do you have too many things on your plate? Are you taking on too many projects? This is critical, 99.9% of everything that you have a deadline on is your own headset. It’s your own mindset. Will the world end if I didn’t get that one extra article done? Nope. Was anything a radical going to happen if I didn’t do podcasts yesterday and I did them? Nope. The only thing that I make my first priority and put real credence to is something that has a true timeline. I had an appointment and I knew I needed to be somewhere at a certain time.
That wasn’t something that I was going to mess around with. It was an important appointment and I gauged my day accordingly. I followed through with that. Look at your list, prioritize it. Make a decision of how committed you are to having peace in your life and mastering this little necromancer called overwhelm/overload. If you’re really committed, then follow through with making the decision for yourself whether you are willing to organize your mind and your processes by putting them into some organizational pattern like Swift or Todoist. Once you have it down on paper, your mind can relax. When they’re down there, you are recognizing the prioritization of them. Then, every day you put down blocks of time that you’re going to do what it is that are the highest priorities on your list.The only thing that can change is you. Click To Tweet
What you’re going to find pretty soon are the things that don’t show up as the first three or four high priorities in your life. You might need to think about letting them go or find somebody else who can do them, delegate or give it up. If you do not learn how to do that, you will continuously feel this heavy-duty overload of not feeling great because you’ll never get it all done. Be realistic. Do what you love to do, do what you want to do, do what it is that brings you joy and the things that you don’t have to do or you could pay someone else to do. It is important that you reassess and allow yourself by letting somebody else do them or giving them up. Hopefully, you’ve got some real tools and you’ve got an organized way to look at this.
You’ve got some foundation to understand where it comes from. It comes from your headset. You can change your mind by changing your viewpoint about what goes on. Are you a victim or are you a master? Are you going to be overwhelmed or are you going to be motivated? Are you going to be passionate or you’re going to love yourself for having so much excitement in your life? When you decide these things, it won’t overload you. It will excite you, delight you and bring you more smiles and more joy than you’ve ever had before. Contemplate that. I invite you to read this again. Download it to your phone, to your iPad, to your computer and read it repeatedly or periodically. Remind yourself about where you might have gotten off the beaten path a little bit. Bring yourself back to the center because you deserve to have joy and you deserve to recognize you are a master of anything that you choose to. Until next time. Feel a hug.
- Relationships Done Different Facebook
- Relationships Done Different Twitter
- Relationships Done Different YouTube
Author: Esateys Stuchiner
Esateys (pronounced Ee sáh teez) is an International Life Transformational Speaker, Author, Master Facilitator, Life Coach and Expert in the Human condition. She is a Nationally and Board Certified Nurse Practitioner. For over 30 years, she has practiced, taught and lectured extensively in the allopathic and alternative medicine field.
Esateys is known for her groundbreaking work in the areas of personal empowerment and health restoration using mindset and inner connection as the catalyst for all change.
Esateys describes herself as the ‘Architect of the New You’ and has dedicated her life and professional career to helping her clients create “New Beginnings” by facilitating self empowerment, economic freedom and restored health.
For more information, go to esateys.com.